Updated: Feb 15
Can't understand why you're recycling emotions? Even when you feel or believe that you have dealt with past emotions or traumas, perhaps you've simply found a way to suppress them by avoiding triggers as opposed to actually healing from them.
December 26, 2018
As we round out 2018, we're closing out what is called a life cycle, which can be associated with patterns of thought and behaviors. Over the last 10 months, you might have noticed the ebb and flow of your deepest, most antagonizing emotions rising to the surface and then drifting into calmness, repeatedly, like waves. This goes on throughout the month and it may be perceived as emotional instability, mood swings, or bipolar behavior. If you pay attention to the timing, you'll notice it shows up during moon cycles or specific lunar phases. While I cannot actually affirm or deny, for you specifically, that it is or isn’t either of the two, I can say, it’s highly likely that the instability you feel is the result of deeply repressed emotions begging to be put to rest.
The #subconscious mind is often compared to the depths of the sea or ocean which is most befitting for this analogy. Imagine your most painful experiences and the attached emotions have sunk like the titanic and are now resting, peacefully at the bottom of an unexplored part of this vast ocean called the subconscious. All of a sudden, a storm begins brewing, call it a trigger if you will; and it’s tossing about rather aggressively, unearthing the fossilized remnants of past experiences. As these waves rise and fall, those deep emotions, that you buried deep within, began resurfacing.
Like the stuff sitting at the bottom of a river bed, your emotions began to rise to the surface of your mind and heart. The feelings impressed upon you by the past experiences, have also resurfaced, creating not only anxiety but an opportunity. You can either do what you’ve always done and run, or you can observe those emotions, and deal with them, allowing you to heal for good.
What I’m sharing here came up because I had noticed such a pattern in my own life. Observing it, this last time around, allowed me to heal from it as opposed to coping, avoiding, escaping, and recycling it.
Initially, when I would notice these upheavals, I began to devise strategies to better cope with them. Being in my 40s, I figured it was time to consider a vitamin & mineral supplement that was rich in nutrients that would support my central nervous system. Vitamin B complex is an excellent solution to stave off the feelings of sadness or heaviness that would generally accompany these seasons. In addition, I started devoting more time to nurturing myself through exercise, meditation, journaling, and other wellness-related activities, which are all well and good. However, what I learned through this process, is this: what I really needed to do was allow myself to feel the feelings that surfaced and deal candidly with them so that I didn’t have to ride the tidal wave of emotion month-over-month.
As we seek to move progressively into new seasons and write new chapters in our lives, it’s important to realize that evolving into a better person means transforming these old energies versus recycling them. Overcoming does not necessarily equate to healing.
Overcoming traumas without healing from them actually keeps you stuck.
Even when you feel or believe that you have dealt with a problem in your past, perhaps you’ve simply found a way to avoid the issue by avoiding triggers. It is a very common means of coping. However, when there are no triggers present, there lies no challenge to confront the feelings and emotions of the past. The result is a delay in the opportunity to heal those emotional scars.
Now is an opportune time to get ahead of the wave by considering those recurring (deep seated) emotions that you’ve been avoiding and evaluating what you can do to release them for good. When they force themselves upon you, speak to your inner self and say “tell me what I need to do to make peace with this." If you are sincere and open, you will receive the answer that you seek.
After a great year (2017), I myself, recently began feeling shut out and cut off. I couldn’t understand why things weren’t moving. I was procrastinating on finishing the editing for the workbook. I was at a career crossroads and I was feeling frustratingly isolated, especially since I made this big move to Kansas, 12 driving hours from my home state of Michigan. I felt in my soul like something was working against me, so I asked myself the question, “SELF what do I need to do? Why do I feel that something is working against me?” My intuition responded, “perhaps you’re working against yourself!” I thought about it and I knew it was the truth! My own pattern of thought is what was working against me. I realized that while I had closed the wounds of my past, perhaps I hadn’t properly treated them so I immediately began speaking a simple affirmation, using my own name, as such:
"______" love you
I Love you "______"
I love you "______" and I will only make choices that support your highest potential
72 hours into this, after speaking it to myself several times throughout the day, things began to change. I felt a sense of calm within my central nervous system as opposed to anxiety, yet I also experienced the physical energy of someone who had consumed one energy drink too many! Doors began opening. Opportunities began surfacing. I finished my writing and completed one of my projects, all in about one week’s time!
This experience however, is part of a larger block of lessons delivered to me during this current life cycle. The long arduous journey was about learning the power of love because love, even self-administered, offers a healing power like no other medicine can provide.
I challenge you to consider where you are right now:
Evaluate your feelings and emotions and identify opportunities for healing. Think about the lessons life has delivered you this year, and previous years – have you overcome them or are you being handed the same lesson over and over? Create a plan of action to give yourself a little more love every day. Give yourself the above treatment daily, several times throughout the day and see how the power of #love directed inward, can impact your life.